Our furry problem

We have 3 cats and we don’t know if we could keep them if we are going to be moving to Ireland.  I was in the kitchen cleaning up and I was thinking about one of our furry kids that I am very close to.  Her name is Bella.  I looked around and I noticed she was not in the living room.  I knew she was on the bed sleeping but I almost called out her name, thinking what it would be like that she was already given away.

I was in bed and was talking to Craig about it, and he was mentioning the same thing about them.  He knew that I was in a thinking process and working in my head to look forward the saddest moment on giving their last meal before handing them over to some stranger who will take care of them for the rest of their days.  This is heartbreaking to even think about it.  

Craig was thinking about the same thing with the cats too and played Gloria Estefan's "Don't want to loose you now".  I know he was depressed.  I could tell from the music he picked out from the television Amazon Music and he didn't turn his back but petting Buster our other cat.  So I think he was thinking about the same thing.

Update / Ireland

We are in the middle of a decision making or trying to find a way to relocating again and to Ireland, possibly Northern Ireland.  I don't know when we will be doing this but I know that I am not happy here in the United States.  I never was happy here.  I do want to return to Ireland and settle down there.  I had fun and enjoyed myself when I lived there back in the 90s for 9 years.  Craig knows I am not happy here and have been depressed.  He too wants to relocate to Europe as well.

I'm in the middle of writing an email to one of the directors in the gay community which I was in contact last year and actually was on the phone with last June.  I am hoping he remembers us and our conversation.

I do hope to be out of the US for good by the Fall.  Just a little confused on what to do with the cats and its sad to give them away.

The need to return to Northern Ireland

I watch movies and shows about Ireland and its getting me depressed more.  I know I shouldn't be watching but its where my heart is and I do enjoy those kind of movies and shows.  I feel that its where I should and suppose to be.  I find myself not happy again like I once was before I moved to Northern Ireland back in 1992 which was part of the reason why I left the United States.  I could kick myself in the ass for following someone that never been when I returned year 2000.  I should had never returned to the United States.  I was going to stay in New York for 10 days then head down to Florida to see a guy which was never been.  I should had returned to Northern Ireland after my 10 days was up.

Craig knows that I want to return and I think he is worried about sacrificing some things like his housing voucher that allows us to have a reduce rate for renting an apartment.  I do think about these things too and also whether he will get the services there in Ireland.  We would be giving up a lot of things like our furniture, the car, and possibly the cats too.

This discussion will continue with him and me.  He does want to move to Europe, so we'll see what we could figure out.

Not to Marry

We have to go to all our appointments at Dartmouth-Hitchcock medical center in Lebanon New Hampshire and its a big hassle for us to drive an hour there and hour back for appointments.  The reason why we have to go back and forth, is that we heard that Dartmouth-Hitchcock is the best services there, so we decided to go there rather than Rutland.  Problem is that our insurances doesn't cover things like physical therapy, counseling, etc around our area because we are classed as a couple.    The government will also decrease our food stamps even more for being a married couple.  How do they expect two people who are on disability to live off very low food stamps?  I could never understand this.  it just doesn't make any sense.

Because of this we had made a decision and that decision was not to get married and just become roommates.  We will keep the wedding bands as a symbol as if we were married.  We go back to being roommates and not get married we could get coverage that we need in our area as single person for counseling, physical therapy, etc.  Our food stamps will also go up.  I am hoping that our rent goes down too.

Wedding Rings

Well, we picked out the wedding rings we wanted, which was sort of like a dragon celtic ring.  I like the ring but sadly that it was the wrong size for me, so I had to order a size bigger.

We are suppose to get married between March 5-9th.  That's when Craig's mother comes to town as she wants to see us get married.  I had asked a friend of mine, Scott, if he could ask his friend if she could marry us at the hotel he owns.  Scott was married there as well.  He was telling me that it would cost us nothing to get married there.  I thought that was nice of him to do that.  So I am waiting for his reply about his friend to marry us.